A New Beginning

So it’s officially 2022! Happy New Year, everyone!

I thought I’d start this blog this year as a way to further discuss my passions while having fun with the whole thing, since I already scream about them so much online where I can. Part of the reason I am so passionate about it is because this specific interest of mine is so incredibly niche, which has made finding content for it rather hard. That being said, the fandom(s) and industry (or rather, industries) have grown exponentially since it started picking up in 2018!

By the time this goes up, however, it’ll probably be past January 1 due to delays, but it was meant to be uploaded in the New Year ahaha. In fact, it may very well be the end of January by the time I finally get this blog up (I will try to update an entry every Saturday and/or Sunday though)!

As for this specific niche interest I’m talking about, it is Chinese media.

It started with donghua when I first discovered Mo Dao Zu Shi in 2018, the animated adaptation of the novel of the same name, as I’ve always been an animation fan. I still remember witnessing a trailer of Wei Wuxian, perched on a tree branch, his lips pressed to a flute as his eyes flashed red, while a murder of crows swarmed above him. It left such a lasting impression on me, lighting this spark of blazing excitement—because in many ways, I couldn’t believe it—that China had managed to produce something like this!

Like many Asians, I grew up with a number of Japanese anime, but I did also have some beloved Chinese childhood cartoons that I would watch over and over again, such as Journey to the West—Legends of the Monkey King (Xi You Ji), Black Cat Detective (Hei Mao Jing Zhang), The Legend of Nezha (Nezha Chuanqi), and Pleasant Goat and Big Big Wolf (Xi Yang Yang yu Hui Tai Lang). They continue to hold up even now—with some even improving over time—and they’ll always hold a special place in my heart, but the Chinese animation industry did feel admittedly stagnant throughout the 2000s to early 2010s.

Now though, as the donghua industry has expanded so much and the donghua The Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation/The Founder of Diabolism (Mo Dao Zu Shi) has officially come to an end in 2021 with its third and final season, while its novel form even received an official English translation in printed form, it seems as good a time as any to start sharing my thoughts on these series in a more organized fashion. I’ve always participated in the fandom, even forming lists of recommendations for anyone who would like to get into donghua, cdramas, and/or cpop, but I thought it would be fun to try a more direct, consistent approach—while also keeping it all light and fun!

This first blog entry will thus mostly consist of my musings on Chinese animation (and media as a whole) as a Canadian-born-Chinese. So yes, while I am technically Chinese, I do not always feel Chinese. I hardly have enough experience or knowledge of Chinese traditions, culture, and tropes to make myself an expert, but I would argue my background does provide me a unique point of view, and I’ve worked hard to serve as a beginner’s reference for entry-level fans with absolutely no familiarity with Chinese culture.

I always grew up seeing myself as Canadian first and foremost, having been taught mainly western festivities and holidays at school, with a good amount of Canadian nationalism instilled within me. I have my own thoughts regarding nationalism and how often patriotism can be taken to too far of an extreme in how people engage with other cultures, but that doesn’t mean I condemn being proud of your country and heritage. These are complex concepts, and I actually explored them in my undergraduate thesis on the history of Chinese animation, which has always been closely tied with artists trying to show nationalism in art, even as the industry has always been very transnational. Writing that thesis challenged my own views of cultural pride, especially in media, and now it informs what I consume, just as my undergraduate experience in Film Studies now also informs my media consumption experience.

But cultural pride and exploration are actually reasons why I’ve gotten so into Chinese media and culture in the last few years! I never really felt connected to my family’s country of origin, considering I grew up in the west, and many immigrant children will tell you that they often feel in between worlds—never enough for either culture. But that being said, it was also hard just because I am, at the end of the day, Chinese. As Canadian as I felt growing up, I am nevertheless Chinese. Like my mom always says, “At the end of the day, you still have a Chinese face.”

And I think it’s hard to deny by now in 2022 that sinophobia is on the rise. I have seen many try to deny it throughout the years, but numerous factors—including but not limited to the pandemic—has made it obvious just how deeply normalized sinophobia has become.

I grew up being told that my family’s country was dirty, that our people were brainwashed, that our language is cacophonous, that the things we created were not worth checking out. I grew up ashamed of my own heritage. There was no chance for nationalism—even defending Chinese culture as not “gross” would get me labelled as a wumao online. People are finally starting to see how unfair some of this is, and I’ve personally enjoyed getting to reconnect more with my own roots and discover a rich world of things previously unknown to me.

For example, I never even celebrated Chinese New Year quite properly, as most of my family was in China. This meant that I didn’t enjoy that many red pockets or even too many decorations, and we had larger than usual—but still modest—dinners for our smaller family (a family that continued to shrink as time wore on). I also did not grow up with other Chinese holidays, like the Dragon Boat Festival, Tomb-Sweeping Festival, etc, which meant I didn’t participate much in their associated traditions either, at least while growing up. 

It was only when I learned more about my paternal grandfather’s story that I grew more interested in Chinese history, considering the topsy-turvy life he led, fighting against the Japanese in the Second World War, fighting for the communists during the Civil War, and then being locked up by the communists during the Cultural Revolution. And slowly, with more historical context, I was able to form a more nuanced understanding of China and my own Chinese identity—which is, no matter what, nonetheless part of my identity at the end of the day.

And I hope all of you will join me on this journey! ♥